Honestly, witnessing a real human falling from the 7th storey and looking at blood gushing from her skull is not exactly the same as what you experience when you're watching..hmmm...lets say..CSI or any of quentin tarantino movies.

your breathing gets heavy.
your mind just wants to believe that everything that's happening around you is not real.
you're cursing cause the ambulance was late...even though deep down you knew that she was gone.

no matter how many times you call out.
no matter how you want to try to save someone.
it's as if it was better that you weren't there.
you know.. so that you don't have to deal with the after-trauma.

bedok police station was an experience.
cool place.. CID's running around everywhere.
but the other dudes at the reception and counters are not as welcoming as you might assume they would be.
nonetheless, gave my statement and left.

and the best part about it... if there's a lead in the investigation... another statement. -_-

but soon after that, over to yenyen's to paint her room.
soft lavender.
i agree with her mum though.
much much brighter and optimistic feeling to the whole room now.
yes yes.. clean and neat. :)

and to end the day on bitter note, we saw a cat that had to drag itself everywhere it went.
cause the back hind legs are both damaged.
the damn agony.
he was dragging himself away when we approached him.
couldn't bring myself to look any point further beyond that.

i just hope that it was a freak of nature that he ends up in that state.
not man-made.

its not cool to lose your life over simple chores like cleaning the window or retrieving bamboo poles. do be conscious alright homosapians?


You tend to draw an imaginary line.
You know.. the in-crowd on one side, the rest on the other.
Then, you'll get comfortable in your own shoes.
Forgetting that feets do grow over time.
That all good things might just end over time.
That one day, you'll realize that you're on the other side of it all without even detecting the shift.

Principles, beliefs, words, promises.. some things that you held on to to confirm that the your position is in place.
that it can't be traded, sold.. replaced.
like a hierarchy system in a company's management organizational chart.
lose your momentum and there you go plunging from board of directors to a simple guy/girl who works in a cubicle, surviving the savaging world of business.

i'm getting off-track. -_-

So for my future self when i actually go through my archives, i shall release the confessions withing thee body:

i made myself this way.
consequences roll with bliss.
parts and parcel of a normal human's life-cycle.

i admit, i haven't been the best of everything.
not to say that i didn't try.
but drifting is life.
things corrode and break.
loosen and decompose.
hanging on will only bring calamity in smallest ways.

so we'll see where the river drifts.
cause for what i can see, i've passed the waterfall.
and i'm just waiting for the next big one. :)

A prosperous happy new year to the chinonets.

cheers. :)


Catched the Song of the Sea with a few of my friends the other day. And it was breathtaking. 


Venting my anger in an entry and hoping that it'll help soothe the pain.

Yenny

Sarah

Ayie

Nadia

Izza

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History

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